Beginning Week 2

I hate this computer some days. I was in the middle of a good post here, and then suddenly, it highlighted all my text, and of course, we all know what happened. With the next keystroke, it was all gone. And I cannot figure out a way to get it back. I can't even figure out why that sort of thing keeps happening! Grrr! And now, of course, the baby isn't going to allow me enough peace to try and get it back. Suffice it to say, w2d1 completed, with just a little more difficulty than week 1. Started the run with tight hamstrings, courtesy of too many hours in heels at Grandma Mary's funeral visitation yesterday, ended with (of course) cramped-up calves. I wonder how long that's going to last? Had a good chat this evening with my TOPS pal, Marca. We agreed that women are pretty much nuts. Doesn't matter how hard we work or how much we accomplish with our lives, if we're overweight, we consider ourselves failures. (I am fat and ugly, so I must be lazy and undisciplined, and therefore, I am worthless.) How ridiculous! Do we not believe that God sees the heart of man, and values us for far more than a number on a scale? We will allow that number on the scale to drive us, to the point that we'll do most anything to lower it, and often do as much damage to our health as simply being overweight does. When if we would allow a desire for a healthier lifestyle to drive us, such as fueling our bodies with good food and working out to increase our strength and abilities, the weight loss would follow, and we'd feel far better for it. Too often we're so desperate for the number to go down that instead of switching from fueling our bodies with bad food to good food, we switch from bad food to nearly NO food! Well, you don't expect your car to do better on no gas than bad gas, do you? Of course not! Our chapter seems to be in a bit of a rut, and we're thinking spring might be the perfect time to see if we can shake things up, work on a whole new attitude. Something to think on, anyway. I imagine we'll talk more on the subject. We're glad to be of a similar mindset, as it's hard enough to get rid of "stinkin thinkin" especially when it's a habit taught to us literally by all of society over the course of our entire lives. Perhaps the help of a friend will make it easier to remember what the goal is and what's REALLY important, here. Honoring the gift of our physical being by tending to it well, not fitting it into a certain size dress. And how much we are worth as wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, and friends. How hard we work, and how much we DO get right, even on the days it seems most everything goes wrong. Marca is an amazing woman. She works hard every day to take care of her family and devotes considerable time and energy to volunteer work for causes she believes in. And all this in the face of her own physical challenges. I'm glad to know her and proud to call her my friend. Yet, if she's not careful, she will look at the number on the scale, or the one sewn into her jeans, and mentally toss all that aside, telling herself she's a failure and she just can't stick to anything, so why even try? Do you know someone who might be in the same boat? Tell her today--and tomorrow, and the next day--that you love her and think she's amazing! Maybe if we hear it often enough, we'll begin to believe.

Reflection

Today seems to be a day for thought and reflection. Perfect, really, for a day I'd decided on for a yoga routine. :) I was considering earlier the circumstances that may have led to my lifelong hatred of running. I was never a terribly physical person. Tag, hide-and-go-seek, and the like were among my least-favored games. Even as a child, I prefered a leisurely walk through the woods, or an afternoon spent curled up with a compelling story. I also had (and still do) a fondness for food. These in combination have led to me spending my life, as far back as I can remember, overweight and out of shape. Being teased for being fat and slow, and not particularly good at physical games did nothing to encourage me to put down my books and play. And then came the culmination. 7th grade PE. Every morning of 7th grade, first period, we were to run 20-some-odd laps (what I'm told is about 1 mile). No easing into it, no walk breaks for those of us less-fit suckers. No rest days (unless you count weekends when we didn't have school). And all of this with a gym teacher who ran his jr. high PE classes as if he were still in Marine boot camp. Which meant those of us who were slow and struggling didn't get encouragement shouted at us, but rather insults! No wonder I learned to despise running, and to believe it was something I simply wasn't made to do. So, I spent the next 15 years or so making all the standard jokes about it (such as, if you see me running, you'd better keep up) and believing only crazy people could possibly ENJOY such torture! Then, I stumbled across dailymile.com. I registered as a walker at first, but I couldn't help being drawn in by the runners, and particularly intrigued by something they called C25K, short for Couch to 5K, a program designed to take the American couch potato, and get him/her running a distance of 5K, or 3.1 miles, in about 9 weeks. The program looked fairly simple: short bursts of running interspersed with walking a while to catch one's breath, with each week bringing the run time up and the walk time down. Now THIS looked like something I could do! The program (and every runner I've met) advocates rest days between running workouts, to allow the muscle tissue to rest and revitalize. Without rest days, I've learned, the body simply cannot get stronger, no matter how hard you work. Could this be why, in 9 months of running a mile every morning, it never got easier? (Ya think?) And then, there was the encouragement! Here, instead of being insulted for being slow, and unable to complete the distance without walking, there are cheers, pats on the back, and the reassurance that you will get stronger, and it will get easier. It doesn't matter what level you're at. The guy training for his tenth marathon will give you a thumbs-up for completing the first week of training, or for the first time you ran a half-mile without stopping. He'll treat your 5K like a major event, encourage you beforehand, wait anxiously afterward to hear how it went. He can whip out a 5K in under 20 minutes without breathing hard, but for you, it's a milestone, and he respects that, because he remembers when it was his milestone. There's also the pervasive attitude that slow mileage is better than no mileage, and that the victory isn't in acheiving a certain pace or distance for the day, but rather in getting your ass off the couch, lacing up your sneakers, and heading out the door. Thank you, my friends. I have never met any of you face-to-face, but you have made me believe in the impossible, and that is an incredible gift.

Farewell to Week 1

Week 1 of C25K is officially in the history books. Today's pace was the best of the week, and I've discovered something important regarding running mechanics. If you move more from the hip, less from the knee, it's not so painful on the calf muscles! Go me! Today's workout actually felt really good (aside from the fact that my calves are killing me), and I'm looking forward to moving on to Week 2 on Monday. But for tomorrow, yoga, no excuses. And for Sunday, a day of total rest. Then, my body should be ready to attack the more challenging runs of Week 2. :) I can feel a definite difference in my body already. Stronger, slimmer, more toned. Weighed in last night at TOPS with a loss of 2.5 pounds for the week, so I must be doing something right, lol! And with all this exercise, I KNOW anything coming off is not muscle!

If at First You Don't Succeed

Try, try again. So the saying goes, anyway. Due to several factors, as well as general discouragement, my last attempt at becoming a runner was a dismal failure. So, with spring comes the season of renewal (WHY do we make New Year's resolutions in January, again?) and the spirit of a fresh start. Today was day 2 of week 1, c25k style. Overall, I am finding the beginning easier this time around, so it heartens me to know that perhaps I did not lose ALL the ground I gained (just most of it, lol). For now, most of my training will take place indoors on the treadmill that I've recently managed to fix, well enough anyhow, but I've already mapped a 5k out-and-back route for the day I'm able to take to the roads. However, being the single parent of 4 small children makes daily outdoor training an obstacle to the dream. I have dealt, over the past few days, with a number of aches and pains, but I must believe it will be worth it in the end. :) Once again, I am spending considerable time on Amazon, drooling over stability running shoes, and I think I have my pair picked out. Now I just have to scrape out the 50 bucks. Why must this be so expensive? And then, I realize, if I ever make it to my eventual dream of running the St. Jude's Marathon (Half would make me very happy) in TN, it will get far MORE expensive! But for now, baby steps. I can train for a 5k in my regular old tennis shoes, at least at first. I hope to be ready by fall, and I think I even have one picked out. :) Wish me luck!

Officially Not My Day

Today I'm reminded of a boy I went to school with, Adam Stluka. When we ordered our class rings Junior year, Adam was the anxious one. From the time we ordered the rings, almost everyday, he asked some variation of, "So, think our rings'll be in today?" Then, months later, when the rings finally arrived, the side of his was engraved "Stulma." He had to send it back, and wait for another one to be made with the right name. I told you that story to tell you this one. Nine days ago, I ordered my first pair of running shoes. Since then, I've been checking Amazon for the tracking info several times a day and checking the mail with the obsession of Spongebob Squarepants. Today, my much-anticipated new shoes arrived. And they don't fit. I have to send them back, wait for the refund, and order them again, a half-size larger this time. Then, I have to sit back and wait, and hope THOSE fit when they get here. ~sigh~ Anyone else wondering if perhaps God is trying to tell me something? Like, "Running's not for you. Move on." Or maybe He's trying to tell me to do something more responsible with that 50 bucks than buy a pair of shoes. Heaven knows, there's a whole laundry list of crap I need to spend money on. Oh, well. Maybe I'll figure it out later. Right now, I'm just a little bummed.

I Feel Like SpongeBob. . .

". . .I'm waiting, I'm waiting, I'm waiting. . ." My shoes were supposed to be here today (pout). Instead, tracking information says they're still in Hazelwood, where they've been since 11-something yesterday morning. Kinda bummed. Today was a beautiful day, and I was kinda looking forward to taking my new shoes on a light test run. Oh, well. Maybe they'll be here tomorrow. New shoes or not, it's been a blessed day. I had a personal "moment", a spiritual breakthrough or message from Heaven of sorts, that I have been waiting on for a considerable amount of time, and I am now much more at peace than I was at the beginning of the day. Hoping to carry that with me for a while.

Starting Over (Awaiting the Arrival of New Shoes)

Okay, so I've been totally off track, and I no doubt will have to start over. I've had several weeks over this summer where things just didn't work out for me to run, but for some reason, I'm hooked on the idea, and I'll be starting again just as soon as my new shoes arrive, which, according to Amazon, should be tomorrow. This will be my first pair of "real" running shoes, so we'll see if the rumors are true and they're better than my beat-up old Dr. Scholl's. Well, almost anything would be by this point, as my old shoes are so worn that the first layer of sole is gone in places, lol. I guess that's the legacy my Depression-era-raised grandmother bestowed on me--I believe in wearing something OUT! But I am committed to saving my running shoes for running only, so I don't wear them out too quickly (I usually don't spend so much on shoes!). Anyhow, I was reading my DM friend, Rev. Run's blog today, and it reminded me that I really should get back on my own, since I'm going back to running very soon. Mostly, it's for me that I'm making this blog. A record of my progress from couch potato, "if I'm running, you'd better keep up" personality, to true runner, hopefully in the best shape of my life, lol. I currently weigh in at approximately 200 lbs. at 5'5'' tall. I have set no official goals for my ending weight, although I plan to maintain my current height. ;) Unofficially, I am thinking of trying to hit 130 lbs., but only because it would give me a loss of over 100 from my highest recorded at TOPS. Still trying to figure out how to get back to TOPS meetings, since they're held on Thursday, and I've started taking my son to karate practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Once again, being a mom trumps being so many other things I aim to be as a woman. Which is sometimes frustrating, but always totally worth it. I truly believe that there is no higher honor God can bestow, and I have a responsibility to live up to it. I just have to remember that modelling healthy habits for my children is part of that. Until next time!